At 3.24am this morning, I felt defeated. Frustrated. Tired. Cranky. Helpless. I felt anything but the kind of Mama I like to be. Or need to be. I felt out of control and entirely out of my depths. And a self confessed control freak like myself, struggles hopelessly at times like these.
I think it's important for me to realise that sometimes things don't go to plan. They don't make sense. I cannot change or reason with them. Sometimes things are what they are. When friends or family tell stories of weeks, months, even years of sleep issues with their children, I listen sympathetically. I nod with knowing and understanding. But I don't truly understand. The truth is, we have been pretty lucky in the area of sleep, with our boys. So when patches of repeated restless nights or sleep deprivation are presented to me, I don't mind admitting, I find it difficult to cope. Apart from feeling crabby, slow, uncoordinated and insular the next day, there is the customary Mama guilt that is just part of the territory.
Scott and I will work through this testing period, as we always do. We will arm ourselves with patience and confidence, because we are the parents and our boys are the children. We should always remember we have the upper hand. There will be some short term pain, for a whole lot of long term gain. Angus will sleep through the night in his bed again. He will learn to go back to sleep when he wakes from a dream and he will accept that this is the way it has to be. It is our job to set the boundaries and to follow them through. And we will.
There's not much I can say other than offer you a massive cyber hug and know that with consistency and time it will get better. I unfortunately have been through it with both of my boys, just at different ages. Sleep deprivation is just torture xox
ReplyDeleteYou will get through this.
ReplyDeletePeople have done this before and people will do this after you. How? Time. I guess this is the trial by fire portion of being parents.
You will enjoy your sleep again.
My daughter is going through this right now.
Know that You are not alone!! Good luck and hold on.
Good luck! My eldest is a terrible sleeper. She's five in October and has rarely slept through the night in her entire life. I've just had to accept it for what it is.
ReplyDeleteMy second is a better sleeper but I when she does have a bad patch I feel out of control, because I expect more from her and when she doesn't deliver, well, it's hard. So I understand what you're saying.
You'll get there. xxx
It will happen, everything seems worse when we don't get enough sleep :( Hopefully you can sneak in a little nap today (for you I mean!) xx
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you need a cuddle and a cup of tea, if I lived near you I would pop on over (just inviting myself!) and give that to you.
ReplyDeleteSleep deprivation sucks ... it just sucks. I know cause it happens in this house too. And it is so hard to wake up and start the next day with patience when you have been up half the night!
I hope it gets better soon and that your weekend is ace!
Oh julie, i know how you feel.. it can be so hard when they are pushing the boundaries, i hope this phases passes quickly and you get some good sleeps soon. Make sure you take care of you. xx
ReplyDeletesounds like you are thinking logically regardless of your lack of sleep. hope sweet slumber comes your way tonight x
ReplyDeleteYes you will. But you're not alone in your pain and I am glad you wrote about this. Hugs and sweet slumber wishes being sent your way xxx
ReplyDeleteOh the horror of those nights. You are not alone in your feelings!! It's just plain hard work and tests every fiber of your being. Sleep well tonight little boys and let mumma rest!! CAZ
ReplyDeleteLove this attitude. And I must confess, I'm a bit of a control freak at times and had exactly the same attitude. My kids now sleep (mostly) well, and I think it is because we instilled good habits right from the very beginning. And if you didn't then? It only takes three nights to get it right. And a little consistence.
ReplyDeleteAll the best! May some lovely Zzzz's come your way soon. xx
Oh, how true!
ReplyDeleteSleep is the most painful parenting issue at times.
But it will pass...that's my mantra of survival! x